Ready for a Glow-Up?
Law 2: Make it Attractive
Despite what you may have heard, dopamine isn’t the enemy—it’s our natural motivator. It lights up the path toward whatever our brain thinks is rewarding, and the strongest motivation comes from anticipation, not the reward itself. James Clear points this out in Atomic Habits that research indicates that our desire for a dopamine hit —whether it’s waiting for a notification ping or craving your favorite playlist—is what actually drives action most of the time.
We’re not going to fight our dopamine wiring, though. We’re going to work with it.
Clear’s 2nd Law of Behavior Change, "Make it Attractive", shows exactly how to redirect that built-in motivation system so it highlights the habits that serve deeper purpose—growth, responsibility, meaningful relationships, contribution—instead of short-term distractions or less-than-helpful habits. When we make the meaningful desirable, we end up with habits we actually want to do, and the old ones quietly lose their pull.
That’s the glow-up: turning biology into an ally for aiming up.
Phase 1: Prep – Know Your Starting Point
Before anything changes, take an honest look. Right now, where is your dopamine landing—and is it helping the life you want to build?
Jordan Peterson puts it plainly in his Guardian interview:
He connects that thought to Rule 7 from 12 Rules for Life: pursue what is meaningful, not what is expedient. Meaning shows up when we voluntarily carry real burdens—building skills, strengthening family, seeking truth. But when dopamine gets captured by quick hits (scrolling, snacking, notifications), it nudges us toward expediency and away from purpose.
Jimmy Carr adds another angle with his equation (from The Diary of a CEO):
Even when life is objectively solid, constant comparison subtracts from your contentment. Dopamine fuels the subtraction: you see someone else’s highlight reel and the "what if I had that?" craving kicks in, pulling attention from your own path.
Quick questions to check your starting point:
- Which dopamine hits leave you feeling empty an hour later?
- Where is envy quietly chipping away at your satisfaction?
- Which habits feel easy right now but are quietly eroding your longer-term goals?
That’s your "before" snapshot. Now let’s move to the glow-up.
Phase 2: Glow-Up Treatments
With Law 2: Make it Attractive, Clear gives us three straightforward ways to make the meaningful irresistible and the superficial less tempting.
1. Temptation Bundling “Exfoliant”
Smooths resistance, adds instant appeal
Pair a "need" habit (something meaningful with a delayed payoff) with a "want" (instant gratification). Dopamine from the want flows to the need, creating real craving for the right thing.
Example: Bundle focused work on your biggest goal with your favorite playlist or morning coffee ritual. Purposeful effort starts feeling like a treat instead of a chore.
Who doesn’t love a good formula?
The Temptation Bundling “Formula”:
After [HABIT I NEED], I will [HABIT I WANT].
The variables:
[CURRENT HABIT] = Something you already do reliably (the cue/anchor).
[HABIT I NEED] = The positive but often delayed-reward behavior you want to build (the one you're trying to make consistent).
[HABIT I WANT] = The enjoyable "temptation" or guilty pleasure you look forward to (the immediate reward).
Combine Habit Stacking with Temptation Bundling:
- After [CURRENT HABIT], I will [HABIT I NEED].
- After [HABIT I NEED], I will [HABIT I WANT].
Examples of Temptation Bundling:
- In creating a week’s worth of posts, I have identified 35 separate sub-tasks. After I complete one of those sub-tasks, I get to cross off that sub-task from the list.
- After I mow the lawn, I will relax on the deck.
Examples of Combining Habit Stacking with Temptation Bundling:
Need: Getting the garden watered
- After I mow the lawn (current habit), I will water the garden (habit I need).
- After I water the garden (habit I need), I will relax on the deck (habit I want).
Need: Injecting Gratitude
- After I get my morning coffee (current habit), I will say one thing I’m grateful for that happened yesterday (need).
- After I say one thing I’m grateful for (need), I will check social media (want).
Need: Making Sales Calls
- After I finish my current task (current), I will make 5 sales calls (need).
- After I make 5 sales calls (need), I will watch sports (want).
The fascinating thing is that with some repetition, eventually we don’t need to do the “want”. By doing the “current”, we begin to associate the good feelings of the “want” with doing the “need”.
2. Social Circle “Sculpting”
Contour your environment for natural support
The influence of your inner circle is profound.
This quote highlights that your mindset, income, health, and habits are heavily influenced by your inner circle.
Clear leverages the concept that we copy the people closest to us—family, friends, chosen circles. Law 2 says be deliberate about who’s around you and who is not. Surround yourself with people where “your” good habits are normal and encouraged; step back from groups that make distraction or comparison easy. Belonging and approval give a dopamine boost, so positive behaviors start feeling natural.
Peterson’s angle: Pick circles that model voluntary responsibility—family dinners centered on real conversation, friends who keep each other accountable to truth and duty.
Carr’s angle: Supportive environments cut down on envy (less one-upping, more mutual encouragement), which helps restore contentment.
Glow-up examples:
- Make family game nights a regular ritual of connection and presence.
- Adjust your social media feed and friend group to make aiming up feel normal.
- Join a book club that reads the books that are helpful to your development.
- Get a gym buddy or join a running group.
- Dine with people who eat what you want to eat.
3. Reframing “Highlighting”
Brings out the best angles of meaning and identity
Change how you look at the habit so it lines up with who you want to become. Over time dopamine shifts from external rewards to internal drive.
Peterson: See tough but important burdens (honest conversations, steady discipline) as meaningful chances to grow.
Carr: Call out the real cost of envy ("This comparison is stealing my peace and focus") so it loses appeal.
Examples:
- I don’t have to exercise, I get to exercise.
- I don’t have to do my homework, I get to do my homework.
- I don’t have to go to work, I get to go to work.
- I don't have to change my eating patterns, I get to make better dietary choices.
These treatments don’t fight dopamine—they guide it. They let the meaningful shine brighter while the expedient dims.
Make it Unattractive – The Inversion for Eliminating Bad Habits
To break bad habits, invert Law 2: Make them unattractive. Highlight the downsides and reframe them negatively so the brain stops craving them. Dopamine fades when the anticipation turns sour.
Examples of what you can remind yourself before engaging:
- Smoking doesn’t really relax me; it doesn’t help manage the root cause of my stress—it just adds health risks, dependency, and expense.
- Drinking doesn’t actually solve any of my problems; it often creates new ones and only delays my current issues.
- Doomscrolling doesn’t keep me informed; it leaves me anxious and wastes hours I could spend on real progress.
- I will regret eating this candy bar as soon as I finish it and in 10 minutes, I will have forgotten I ate it.
Reframe the bad habit as something that pulls you away from purpose and has a dark side, and the craving will weaken over time.
These treatments don’t fight dopamine—they guide it. They let the meaningful shine brighter while the expedient dims.
Phase 3: The Reveal
Step back and compare.
The Before
- Dopamine chasing quick hits that crash and feed addiction
- Envy quietly subtracting from quality of life
- Expedient habits winning the short game, leaving fragility later
- Happiness as the shaky target, purpose pushed to the side
The After
- Sustainable craving for meaningful actions—dopamine working for you
- Envy actively reduced through reframing, gratitude, and better circles
- Contentment as the steady baseline (Carr), unpredictable happiness as a welcome side effect (Peterson)
- Purpose building steadily: mastery, stronger relationships, real contribution
We’re not denying dopamine—we’re directing it. “Make it Attractive” turns biology into a tool for a purposeful, contented life.
Book Your Glow-Up
Your habit glow-up can start today. Pick one habit connected to a meaningful, longer-term objective. Run it through the three treatments: bundle it, sculpt the environment around it, reframe how you see it(and invert for any bad habit you want to drop). Watch how the anticipation shifts from "ugh, I have to" to "yes, I want to."
Thanks for reading and let glowing-up be a part of Aiming Up!
